#TOPTENTUESDAY: T-PAIN HOOKS

The Lampin' Blog presents Top 10 Tuesday. On certain Tuesdays we bring you our favorite 10 tracks from one of our favorite music artists. Enjoy.

I think I can speak for Nev when I say T-Pain is one of our favorite artists from the '00s. Say what you want about his gimmicky autotune, T-Pain influenced a whole generation of hip-hop, for better or for worse. Dude has pipes without autotune anyways.

Along with Akon (the debate between who's better is something we intend to address in the future), Teddy Payne was the go-to-guy for a hook, and while it was brief, he was on top of the rap game. Although he gave a lane for many rappers that I can't stand, his innovation with autotune forever changed music as we know it. The energy of a T-Pain hook is unparalleled, and in the (modified) words of the great Mack 10, "It ain't a hit until T-Pain spit."

Without further ado, #Top10Tuesday returns with my favorite 10 T-Pain hooks.

10. "Buy U A Drank" (feat. Yung Joc) - Epiphany

Three things about this song:

1. Impossible not to lean and rock to it.

2. Impossible to not sing "WE IN THE BED LIKE OOOH" at the top of your lungs.

3. An all-time middle school dance favorite.

Besides that there really isn't much else I can say about it. It's about as straight forward a song as you'll hear and to this day the opening guitar or whatever instrument that is paired with the snaps will get me going.

9. "U and Dat" - E-40 feat. Kandi Gurl

Teddy Westside links up with Bay Area legend E-40 for "U and Dat" off of Fawty's My Ghetto Report Card. This song is notable because it's the first time I heard a woman's private parts referred to as "monkey". Apparently that's a thing. This is one of the many songs that was probably way too explicit for me to be listening to in middle school.

8. "Kiss Kiss" - Chris Brown

Man what happened to Chris Brown. Dudes first two albums had some incredible joints on them and now he's consistently producing trash for the masses' eardrums. Seriously fuck this guy.

Anyways, Nev absolutely destroyed a party in our college days by putting this on. Picture a crammed apartment with 40-50 people (Cal Lu did things big) all silent with the cops at the front door. The owner of the apartment (shouts Scotty P) somehow talked his way out of them shutting it down, and with perfect timing Nev hit play, somehow skipping the 25 second Nappy Boy Radio intro and directly into "YEH, SHE WANT THAT LOVEY DOVEY." Pandemonium ensued. An all time wet moment in KyaLew history.

7. "The Boss" - Rick Ross

This was a typical blueprint of a T-Pain feature complete with three hooks, a mini verse and outro ad lib. It's nothing new from Rozay, talking about how much blow he's been pushing and rhyming "boss" with "Ross" for the umpteenth time in his career. I understand why he got so much shit for the correctional officer picture that came out, but did anyone actually believed this guy was a drug kingpin? Authenticity is a big part of rap, and while Ricky has got some bangers under his (oversized) belt, he will never be taken as seriously as he once was.

6. "Shawty" - Plies

Another classic example of a song T-Pain takes to another level. Plies is the definition of an "ain't shit" rapper in terms of skill. However, Pain on the hook makes his nails on a chalkboard sounding voice somewhat bearable. The hook of this is purely sublime and will make any side chick feel like a Friday starter.

5. "Know What I'm Doin'" - Birdman & Lil Wayne feat. Rick Ross

Probably one of T-Pain's more overlooked hooks. This track is off of Birdman and Lil Wayne's joint album Like Father, Like Son which was somewhat underwhelming, especially considering Weezy's reign at the top of the rap game. "Know What I'm Doin'" has a braggadocio chorus unable to be executed by anyone other than T-Pain.

4. "I'm N Luv" (feat. Mike Jaaawnes) - Rappa Ternt Sanga

Dumpster Boy extraordinaire Mike Jones makes an appearance on the second single of Pain's debut album Rappa Ternt Sanga (spelling is apparently not one of his strong suits). While the hook is quite simple, there is something hypnotizing about it and if you don't sing along to it at least once then you're not to be trusted.

3. "I'm So Hood (Remix)" - DJ Khaled ft. Everyone

Apparently the budget for this music video was $25

There was something about a DJ Khaled collaboration that got me excited as a kid. Every time I saw a new one on iTunes I automatically downloaded it. While I was occasionally left disappointed ("Out Here Grindin'" was particularly unsatisfying), most of the time it was a pretty safe bet. Such was the case with the "I'm So Hood" remix. I hadn't previously heard the original version (try not saying that in Ludacris' voice), but I was immediately drawn in by T-Pain's bellowing opener. I'm also glad that I heard the remix first, because it is markedly superior to its OG version.

2. "Cash Flow" - Ace Hood ft. Rick Ross

Ace Hood is another relatively garbage rapper that was given a career from a T-Pain chorus. I could probably listen to this hook on repeat. Officer Ricky makes yet another appearance on this list, maybe it's something about their contrasting voices that makes them such a compelling duo. Only issue with this song is that Teddy didn't get a verse. Side note, for whatever reason this song sounds 10x better in a car.

1. "Go Hard" - DJ Khaled and Kanye West

Maaaaan this shit used to get me so hyped on the bus to my high school baseball games. It almost made getting mercied by Chatsworth bearable (s/o Meusborn). I always wanted to shout out "If you was as real as me you would never let another n*gga step on yo yard" at the top of my lungs but our JV coach was super anal about cussing on the bus (shouts my dude Andrew Sherman aka the Sherminator aka Sherm Stick aka..). That and the use of the n-word is super offensive and I'm PC as eff.

Well there you have it. The best hooks from one of the best hook men to ever do it. I realize that there's a lot of other ones I could've added but I also realize that you should keep your goddamn opinion to yourself and make your own list. Until next time.

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